jaalakam november-december 2003

 Shattered Pearls at Birth

Hari Kochat

"Children’s Village" - A categorical name sugared with Innocence. The name symbolizes how many faces of innocence have merged with the beauty of the village? Though today’s generation has almost forgotten about untouchability, inequality still manifests itself as an oasis in front of those infants; it really strikes the mind as to how backward we are! Because of the links of such innocents who are pushed to be inferiors, how many houses, villages stand as moth-less pillars of new culture? There could be many eyes to watch happily the site of that mini village with its tiny inhabitants in their playful mirth. But when I thought that most of us in today’s fast moving pace of life are unable to understand the oscillating emotions of these little hearts, I felt hurt. Like the elderly and worldly-wise souls, doesn’t these newborn also have a heart and insight of there own? Which child would not long for parents’ love, their support and caressing? We are unable to see cord leading to the height of emotional feelings in the newborn, as a mirror image of our own.

When the culture of humanitarian value of discipline has begun to become moth eaten these days, there is doubt if the ‘value’ of children has fallen. There is a proverb as believed by our elders "If the clothes are torn they can be stitched, but if the young heart is hurt, it is difficult for that wound to heal". When the economic density in births dropped it is as if the old theories of progress believed by our ancestors are blown to winds.

I felt many times if the children have been misused to become tools of advertisements. To expose a country’s poverty line, hasn’t more enthusiasm shown, to cast pictures of starved marrow less bones of infants? To capture attention and pity the poor kids are turned into components of trade in front of public. When modernism gets into more limelight the earlier mentioned loss of value does not end here.

During war, enemies use innocent children as cover. Like a packet of meat, how many wounded children and infants bundled in tattered clothes are exhibited through various media to earn the pity of foreign countries? In the tug-of- war between the various policies of foreign government organizations, at international forums and during bloodshed within the nation, usually are not these innocent children "the sacrificial goats?"

If God created the stars as innumerable eyes of night, are not these divine children, sent to this earth to obtain maximum daylight in those eyes? Before a child is born once atleast all parents would have prayed, "let the child to be born bear all the virtues of the mother and not even one single sin of the father". That does not mean that there are only sins in a father or only virtues in a mother. We have to understand the universal truth underlying in it. Originating as a divine spring, flowing through parents’ love all children crossing the doorstep to spread delight in this world must be of noble birth. In the new born only one thing will be noticeable: "Innocence". When they arrive into this world, into this new life, longing only for love, if even a drop of that is denied, what answer do we have for them?

The perception we have is that a newborn child requires some days to recognize its father and mother. But I have no idea, whether we would have ever thought, that there could be many ‘inborn’ sensitive emotions unknown to us in that new life.

There cannot be similarity between two souls or two lives. They are not equal in all. Life is always a ‘foreign’ language to us. That is why we are unable to understand another life and many times, we speak wrongly, Once more I remembered the experiences I had when my child was born years back. At that time of my child’s birth few doubts that came to my mind are still as fresh and a surprise even today. Sitting close by the mother with the labor pain, I would only suppress the growing anxiety in me. The minutes tickling by appeared to be prolonged. The mental pressure of impatience and dilemma kept rising up. At last, slowly the much-awaited moment of anxiety arrived. My child is born! The cry of the infant did not pain me. But it gave a sigh of relief of unloading life’s heaviest burden! The newborn kid cried aloud as if to announce a victory. Having unloaded the weight she bore for ten months the mother lay tired strained off all energy.

Looking at the New Life, crying non-stop, I did not know what to do. Having experienced the internal warmth from his mother for last ten months, the infant could differentiate the warmth in the hands of the "stranger". Having heard the incessant cry of her child the exhausted mother opened her eyes and raised her hands to hold the child. As soon as the mother held the little one, just like a stopwatch the cry stopped! I was stunned. ‘Unni’ (the new born) who is just born, recognizing his mother? That touch, that heat- the newborn ‘Unni’ whose eyes are not yet opened – showing signs of recognition it is another universal truth that we whose brains are fully developed may not recognize anyone just with a touch alone. The reality of differentiating just by a mere touch – which we grown-ups do not possess - ‘is it not a boon to the New Born?’ I wondered. As moments passed Unni brought one more truth to light. Just for fun, while Unni was still inside his mother, as he was ‘sanctified’ in the womb, keeping my hand on my beloved’s stomach I used to ask Unni, "my darling child are you sleeping?"

At such times my beloved would say, "see you woke the kid; he has started his movements". I never gave much thought to that then. After his birth, I repeated those questions I had asked earlier, while he slept beside his mother, stopping his cries, recognizing that familiar warmth of his mother’s body. Startled, when he opened his eyes as if he recognized my voice, I was amazed. In the newborn Unni, there are many inborn sensitive, concentrated feelings, which we never paid attention. The infants do not learn to recognize the father and the mother from the maiden lessons we teach. It is an inborn instinct. Isn’t the child able to differentiate the anger and the love with that inborn instinct, the sensitive quality? Doesn’t the newborn understand the loving caresses and the gentle taps on his body? Is it because of this that the children who hear lullabies and sleep awake with a start when they hear some unpleasant or annoying sound? When unknown people lift him the infant cries. Till they gain the ability to speak, or able to stop what they don’t like, Nature has gifted them to rebel in this particular manner – that’s we call "unfamiliarity"!

If anything goes against their likings, children know how to express their protest. No one needs to teach these to any new born. Can we ever find an answer as to how all the new born infants understand these in the same way, as if they learnt these in the ‘kinder garden’ books? To summarize, today’s human beings need to remember only one thing. Infants also have a heart. They too yearn for love. Can the electro blanket replace the warmth of a mother? Is it possible to buy a father’s natural fondling or a mother loves lullabies? To be thrown out in this world, as a continuity of a wrongdoing, what ills have these children committed to anyone? These souls rejected by society from birth they face contempt and cruelty – many times, if the residue of such behavior remain in them like thorns, then who is responsible for that- they or us? When abusive words are uttered under the intoxication of liquor, is it proper to blame the liquor? Is that all? Is it not true, that when too many restrictions are imposed there is more impulse for committing ‘Wrongs’? Adam dared to eat the Apple because of hunger or because of imposing ‘restriction’? Should the cruel gain of the world be aimed towards these innocent lives? What result do these human gestures leave afterwards? Many of these little lives are plucked away like ‘unwanted hairs’- isn’t that the truth?

The extensive meaning of the word "Mother" (amma) - we have all enjoyed hearing it repeatedly, many times, from the poet’s colorful pasteurization. But not knowing the truth of the parentage of the children and unmindful of the old adage, "My child is the precious child", by sacrificing their lives for such discarded children, there are these ‘mothers’ whom I got to know for the first time in my life. I will always remember that day, as of today. Without wishing for anything in return, forgoing all the pleasures in life, all aspirations in one’s life focused on the ten or fifteen lives under one roof at a time, observing penance are these "Mothers". Astonishingly I stood standstill and watched a home with ten or fifteen children and a mother and a tiny village with many such ‘homes’! Their affection and cordial exchange of words between them and to their "Mother" felt to me unseen in today’s world. I felt like discovering a lost treasure from golden times of our past heritage. That is the ‘children’s Village’ which I mentioned in the opening lines. The village that’s situated in the suburb of my native place in ‘Kerala’ which is also known as "the cultural capital" of the state. A holy place, which quietly announces that still there are people with good heart and that, will find peace. That is how I saw that rural pattern of life in that place. I felt that is the abode where God lives – in those houses. I felt that all the fondness that could be had from a mother and the father existed in there. From the little infants who are discarded, to those nearing the age of marriage, getting the unbiased love and attention of a ‘mother’, but still looking at this world without any grudge or grievance, with hopes and good dreams, those living in that village, will always remain afresh in my mind. In front of that invaluable large heartedness of sacrifice and the caressing, I who am a traveler and who am trapped in alien shackles, without my own knowledge, folded my hands and prayed in my heart, "Mother! If there is one more life to me in this world let me be lucky to be born again as your child".

©jaalakam